Skip to main content

Dishwasher

I wonder why my dishwasher gets tablets and all I get is counselling.

I sit down next to it to talk.

I tell it I think it may be overmedicated,
I tell it of my concern that its cleanliness obsession may be unhealthy.

It gives me the silent treatment, and then a passive-aggressive hum.

I tell it I think it should get out more,
try and make friends with some other major appliances.

Has it fallen out with the washing machine?
What about that thing they all used to do together with the dryer?

Unhelpful silence. A little sass from a flashing light.

I wonder aloud if it could drink less, cut down on the rinse aid.
Maybe go for a walk in the fresh air.

Could it do some more creative work? Break the cycle of filling with dirty things it feels it has to clean and ending up feeling emptied out?

Could it at least try something different, maybe in another room?
A hobby? One that doesn’t involve tablets and rinse aid.

Lastly, I try to coax it into thinking about the effect its behaviour has on others. The breakdown and foul moods, the water spilling all over the floor, the mess it leaves behind. 
Is that why it’s constantly cleaning?

It opens up with a steamy sigh. Which I suppose is progress. At least we’re talking about it now.

I get up from the kitchen floor, tell it that I’ll send it an invoice for the time and walk to work.
I decide that perhaps I shan’t walk past the bottle shop on the way home.


Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Recent distraction aggregation

Thinking about Notebooks in B6 size. Hmmm, B6, you say? I don't have many of them, and there are lots of accessories I can obsess over? Perfect. This is all you need. Do not obsess over....oh. Don't do this... ...it will shit on you. Music A German Electro Pop Metal band? It seems unlikely, and yet... Stuck in my head The Prodigy make themselves sound like Daleks intent on destroying Middlesex General The Chemical Brothers and Beck, it was obviously going to be an earworm.
Post a Comment
Read more

Time on my own

  Time on my own makes me cook things, things I wouldn't normally cook with 3 vegetarians living in the same house. Slow barbequed brisket being one... ...and roast belly pork on tabouleh with improvised master stock being another. Other things time on my own seems to make me do is binge-watch old TV series and fall asleep on the sofa. Also, I make beer, as much beer as I have the capacity for in my system. Unfortunately what it hasn't done is provoke me to write any more or amend my habits around meditation or alcohol consumption. Clearly some form of cognitive intervention is going to have to take place for these. Bugger.
Post a Comment
Read more

Not all Propaganda is Art

Don't ignore the spies' role in the creation of the media landscape of the late twentieth century. They used it to contain radical voices and maintain a dominant narrative that suited their strategic agenda. That's the chief lesson in this series, but it takes a while to really arrive and it takes many a digression through the lives of its three main protagonists on the way to it. A worthwhile listen if you have an interest in this era of history and culture. “ Not All Propaganda is Art ”  tells the story of three writers who got caught up in the Cultural Cold War between the years of 1956 and 1960: New Yorker writer and “little magazine” champion Dwight Macdonald, British theater critic and “Angry Young Man” Kenneth Tynan, and legendary Native Son novelist Richard Wright, who at this time was living in exile in France in protest of American racism. All three collaborated with and were targeted by American, British, and French security agencies in Cold War propaganda battle...
Post a Comment
Read more